One Life is a non-dual philosophy. To know One Life is to experience all in an awakened state of being. In the One Life, all sentient beings are one. There is no path to the One Life, it is simply here and now.

Negative and Positive Emotions

Q: I would like to know about this. The emotional body, as you said, wishes to experience all, and there seems to be positive and negative things to experience. Maybe those aren't the correct terminology. For instance, hate as an emotion has a very negative connotation. You stated that we all want to experience - I'm having a hard time defining the question here, but the point is that there's negative and positive. I guess I always thought about trying to bring in the positive things in life instead of the negative things. Are we supposed to equally emote? On both levels or what?

DK: Let us discuss this for you. The question is about negative and positive emotions. We can discuss that very specifically and perhaps that will be of use for you. The emotional body wants to experience. It wants to have every experience it possibly can. You understand that the emotional body is motivated to experience all degrees of energy - no matter what they are. Yet, certain specific vibratory frequencies of energy feel certain ways.

Imagine that you are a child. You have no evaluative understanding of your emotions. You simply feel what you feel. At one point, you taste chocolate and it's delightful and it's wonderful. At another point, you taste rutabagas and it's bitter and it's difficult and it's stringy and it's chewy. You appropriately, for what people have taught you, say, "I hate rutabagas." Does that make you, for having that experience of disliking the taste, not enjoying it, somehow a bad person because you experienced "hate" -abhorring the rutabagas? Or is there some kind of information that you received in that authentic emotional response to that experience that is of use and value? Would you limit ever trying another food because you might possibly hate it? More likely you know that you're probably going to try other foods, you're probably going to hate some and love some others.

When we put it in the context of food, it's all very simple. You're open. You'll try it. You know you'll hate some; you know you'll love some. You're not upset with yourself for hating rutabagas. You feel like it's your right. You feel like you have every reason to make those kind of choices in your life; what you enjoy eating and what you don't enjoy eating. It's perfectly acceptable for you to say, "I hate rutabagas. I never want to eat them again. I never want to see them again. I don't want to smell them. I don't like anything about them." You allow yourself that because you've been taught that that's acceptable. But you've been taught that it's unacceptable to hate your grandmother. Even though she might smell, taste, and feel like rutabagas. (Laughter)

What we're talking about is that it isn't the authentic emotion of hate that begins to make it a negative experience. It's the judgments, the pictures, the way that you are taught to then describe that emotional experience, if it occurs between you and your grandmother, as negative. When we're talking about the conflicts that the emotional body gets engaged in, we're talking about precisely that. You hate your grandmother; she's just like rutabagas. But you've been taught that that's not right; that's not appropriate. You should love her. Even if she smells bad, you should give her a kiss, etc. So you're in desperate conflict between what you're really experiencing in terms of the emotional content of the energy that's present and what you're trying to experience.

In other words, you're trying to experience the positive because you "should" have a good relationship with your grandmother. That conflict is what distorts the emotion. It isn't just a simple response of "hate" like you had towards the rutabagas. It becomes this distorted emotional experience of, "How do I relate to her when I don't want to get close to her? How can I sort of say hello and give her a hug and act like she's ok when I'm repulsed by her?" All of that creates distortions. The distortions then separate you from the truth of the experience and when you're separated from the truth of the experience, as we were speaking, you're no longer really experiencing the hate. So you're probably going to have more and more and more relationships with the same kind of conflict emotionally speaking. It becomes habitual. Until you can experience the innocence of emotional response without all of the pictures and the judgments, it is not an authentic emotional experience. You will be driven to get the authentic experience, but will easily get stuck in the distorted experiences as negative.

There is a tremendous amount of difference between reacting from distorted emotion and just experiencing the authentic emotion. If you hated your grandmother and you took action to kill her, then that hate has become so distorted that the reaction becomes an evil deed. If you hated your grandmother and you innocently understood that as an authentic emotional experience, then the likelihood of an outrageous reaction to the hatred is very, very minimal. Somewhere you may have been told that people kill other people because they hate them. And we're using this as an example. It doesn't mean that is all of your programming. But in some of you, that may be there. And so the great fear is that if you hate someone, you might kill them. You might do something terrible. You might become evil. So you fear even experiencing the hatred because you're really fearing the distorted emotion and the outrageous reaction to it, and believe that action is attached to that feeling. So you then begin to hate yourself, in this case. If you hate your grandmother and it means that you could kill her and you think that killing is evil, then you hate yourself for hating your grandmother, it is no longer an innocent emotional response driven by your emotional body and your need to experience. It's a distortion. It's something that then grips you with patterned or habitual reactions supported by concepts, stories, and beliefs. You come to an erroneous conclusion that "hatred leads to killing." Of course, this is all the "illusion"--not the real experience.

There isn't, from our perspective, a negative emotion. They're all there to assist you in making your choices. The choices that you make that are most clearly aligned to authentic emotional experiences, to the truth, are choices that are really about the magnificence of your life unfolding. There are innumerable opportunities and choices that are being made in every moment. Each time that you make a choice and each time that you have an opportunity and you guide yourself with consideration of authentic emotional experiences, you're really making a more profound, a greater definition of who and what you really are. From our perspective, the more honest you are with your innocent emotional responses, the more you're really operating from your Deep Self guiding you. We would say your Deep Self speaks to you in honesty. What you know to be your honesty is truly your greatest guidance. Do you understand? Does this make sense to you? Is there any more about this?

Q: Yes. Do you say, "Well, I hate my grandmother but I have to interact with her," or do you say, "I avoid my grandmother." How do you deal with what you perceive there?

DK: This is where you're making your choices. If your authentic emotional response is "I hate my grandmother" and you're perfectly all right with hating your grandmother, and at the same time, you say, "I must interact with her," then you're making a choice to interact from the point of reference of knowing that you are choosing to interact with her and perfectly all right with hating her, then your choice of interacting with her is going to take a very clear and honest form, going to move along a very clear and honest pathway. If you do not make that choice from that point of reference of being very aware and allowing an authentic emotional response, you're going to operate in those distortions. You're going to pretend that you like her because you think that's the way that you can interact with her and you think that you should. It isn't because you've chosen to stand in the center of allowing both of those things to be present in your being. It's because you're in conflict and you're operating in conflict. When you make choices, and are honest with yourself, you eliminate the conflict. When you make the choice, you're begin to operate along a pathway that is of your choosing. Do you understand?

Q: And what would be the consequence of avoidance?

DK: It would simply be another choice. If it comes from choice, if you say, "I hate my grandmother. My choice is to avoid her," then you're not doing anything other than getting clear and responsible about the choice that you're making. If you're avoiding her and at the same time feeling like you should interact with her, then you're creating another conflict. The avoidance is once again a distorted thing because it isn't a clear choice. You haven't made a choice to avoid or interact. You've created a conflict and something within you has to do with a "should" and an avoidance. Do you understand?

Q:  Yes, Thank you.



Email Newsletter icon, E-mail Newsletter icon, Email List icon, E-mail List icon Sign up for my Email Newsletter THE ONE LIFE TUTORIALS